Friday, May 3, 2013

Do what makes you nothing but happy.

What is the point of doing anything otherwise? The primary reason why we as kids were asked to study, sleep early , eat food on time, play well, be a good child at school, grow up and go to a good college, get a reputed job , earn well was so that we could be happy. Everything that was asked from us as kids or even after we grew up by our parents was so that we could be happy. Why then would anyone do something that doesn't make us happy?

Think about it, I decided to succumb to something that didn't make me happy because I was scared not doing that MIGHT make me even more unhappy. The fear of greater unhappiness made us stick to the current status of dissatisfaction. You stay doing the same thing for the next thirty years. Assume you are 20 something, after 30 years you become 50 something. Salt and pepper hair, loose skin, wrinkles, all the glamour beginning to fade away. And then you think? Why did I do that particular thing that didn't make me happy?

I am a non drinker, non smoker. I have a lot of close friends who drink and smoke which is absolutely fine with me. I love them dearly and the smoking, drinking has nothing to do with my judgement of them. But there have been times in the past where I have been at parties with people I didn't know too well and always ended up being an outcast by being the only one who didn't drink and smoke. Smoking is fine as normally no one normally forces you to smoke. But not wanting to drink is quite a social stigma and people have come and told me I am like a 40 year old wanting to go to bed early without drinking (which I probably just might be). I have wished to succumb to that situation a few times, and honestly I have even decided to have a small glass of drink or something. I wake up the next day feeling totally groggy, my dance class mostly would have got missed as I would have got up late. And I feel like an entire day is about to get wasted.

Now, I am not oppose to the concept of drinking. I feel very happy for the people who get very happy drinking. It feels like a nice solution for the people who have drinking suit them. But it unfortunately does not suit my body. Why then, I wonder , should I succumb to something which ends up not making me feel happy?


This is an extremely trivial example of what I am talking about. But hope you get my point. Anything big or small that doesn't make us happy but we still do it, I don't know why. Like we get angry at someone who has been irritating us, and we end up feeling irritable long after the person has left. And then we are grumpy with ourselves, with our loved ones, with friends and family. What was the point then of feeling grumpy?

Life would be so much simpler if we just decide at every moment whether to do something or not to do something depending on whether it makes you happy. Now there are situations where doing something doesn't make you really happy but doesn't make you sad either. But say, it makes your spouse happy. Should you go ahead and do it? I say totally . Because seeing your spouse happy will make you feel happier (assuming it will) . Again comes around to doing what makes you happy. Even if the thing that makes you happy is seeing your loved one happy.