Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Why Being A Woman And Travelling Alone Is So Much Fun

Every woman must do this at least once in her lifetime. Trust me, you will feel like the queen of the world. And you do not need to feel scared of being alone and in danger. Travelling alone will make you tougher. Also because having someone need not guarantee not getting into danger too.

I travel alone. A lot. I started travelling alone immediately after 12th standard. That way I'm extremely lucky to have a family that has taught me to be independent at an early age. I love the fact that they do not panic whenever they know I am travelling alone, and now after so many years it is very routine for them.

My favourite part of travelling alone is sitting and sipping coffee while you wait for the flight. That way even bus and train journeys alone are super fun, but you will find more silence before a flight journey.

I love journeys alone most because I get time to think of what I want to do. I tend to get into the urgent instead of the important most of the time. And by the time I reach the important, it becomes too late.

I just got myself a cup of coffee and Goodhousekeeping magazine from Mumbai airport. I luckily got transferred to a direct flight from Mumbai to Bangalore, instead of the Chennai halt. I shamelessly also stretched in the seating area of the flight. It's about 2.00am and Mumbai airport looks just so alive.

I always carry my earphones. Always. If there is no music, the trip is not the same. I had come here for a performance with Daksha Sheth Dance Company and had to get back as early as possible so that I could reach for a school project.

So I met this lovely cab guy who dropped me to the airport, and we had the most fun conversation (dont worry, I'm safe and always armed with pepper sprays and Swiss knives) . He was telling me the state of affairs of Bihar, where he came from. His perspective on the government was very interesting, because all the opinions that we tend to hear is from our circle of friends.

I like nights like this. My boarding call is here and I'll have to run. I'll continue my monologue in the next post.

Sleep tight :)

I am planning a couple of photoshoot ideas when I go home for my vacation. Do you have ideas that you can help me with? If you have ever met me, or seen me, you might have ideas as to what style I might be able to pull off. Because honestly I myself don't know. I have been sporting the I-don't-care-if-i-look-weird style these days. But want to get out of it soon.

Saturday, August 16, 2014

7am to 10pm Love. Philosophy. Updates About Life.

I would not be exaggerating if I say I have been working for about 14 hours a day, which includes at least five to seven hours of dancing and easily two hours of travel. Its funny though because I do not mind it one bit. In fact I absolutely love it. You might think it is because I am a workaholic, but the reality is because I feel good about the fact that I have enough work on my platter.

Being a freelancer, having busy days definitely gives you the greatest high possible. I started dancing professionally when I was almost 24. So essentially, I still have just about three years experience. I always do things in a hurry, talk in a hurry, work in a hurry. I think it has something to do with the fact that my clock is ticking faster. I have lesser time to achieve what a 16 year old dancer can.

I just decided to share my thoughts with you.

I like blogging because it is like talking to someone who wants to listen to me.
I like talking. A lot.
I can talk for hours together without getting bored. From fashion to wellness to telling them how much I love my cat and my dog. To how much I love dancing. And food. And everything.

I am famous for passing out in the living room each night, even if we have a house party. And then waking up early in the morning just so that I can wake others up and talk to them.

I am loving the thought of next week. I am traveling to Mumbai on Monday and performing for the prestigious Daksha Sheth Dance Company. And I cannot express how much I am in awe of Daksha Didi's choreography.

Our team from Piah Dance Company is then leaving for Salem on Tuesday for a performance, and I am finally leaving for Gujarat to take a vacation with my family. I do not know how much sleep I will get. But you know what, I shall pass out whenever I can and get my dosage of sleep anyway.

In between all this, our company is doing a choreography for a school . I love kids just because they have no ego in them. If they like someone they say it. Simple. No ego comes to play even a little bit. 

So these I am working on believing more in myself. Not that I do not believe. But just that I need to believe more than I currently do. Not that that has anything to do with whether I really can or not. But just to believe I can.

Have you ever had days where you really want someone to come and evaluate you, in the most rightful manner, because you are just not able to evaluate yourself right? That happens with me. A lot. And honestly, the sooner I believe that I only can evaluate myself best, the better. There will always be bias otherwise. Friends and family will say better-than-real things to you. People who can see faults in you will focus more on the faults. So essentially I need to grow up and understand I cannot be spoon fed anymore.

So I shall tell you a little secret. But you need to promise me you won't judge me.
Actually even if you do, I will still share it. 

I have a dream of writing a book. A happy book. I do not know how it will go. But it will just be happy. You will feel happy at the end of it. It will not preach, or ask you to do things a particular way. Nor will it be a self help book. It will just be a happy book.

I have always loved motivating someone who has been feeling low in their lives. Maybe because I have felt low quite a few times too. And that feeling sucked. So bad.

And yes, the person who wrote a mail to me regarding the same, I am sorry I wasn't able to get back to you sooner, but I soon will. And I will try and make you feel better hopefully.

Honestly, I do not know where this blog is going. Its like a outlet where I am just talking. Maybe I should stop now. Good luck with reading this entirely. And if you have reached the bottom of this page and are reading this exact sentence right now, then you are a really good listener. 

I really should stop now.
Be happy, because I know shit happens to all of us. So lets keep the shit aside for a while and enjoy the not-so-shitty part of life. 
Look at my cat and dog if you like pets. They are really cute. 

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

I Wish I Had A Magic Wand

I love talking to people. Listening to them when they are unhappy about something. When I need to rate myself out of happiness, I am pretty happy I would say. Of course I have days where I get frustrated and think I need to be at a place where I have still not reached. I set a lot of targets which are very, very high. And when I don't achieve it I do brood over it on a temporary basis.

But what makes me really happy despite those moments where I question myself is listening to others' problems.

I always wish I could listen to others and make them feel better when they don't feel too great about themselves. 

I wish there was a job titled "Happiness Consultant" where I could have a room and talk to anyone who didn't feel happy and make them happy.

Even now, I often think from time to time, if different companies had a Happiness Consultant, someone any employee could go talk to, how cool would that be. Because not every time someone is looking only for a solution, sometimes they are also looking to feel good about themselves.

I know this might sound weird, but if any of you feel low ever in life, and need someone to talk to, and vent out things you are not able to comprehend in your own head, you can write to me at priya.kumar.0707@gmail.com. I will try my best to make you happy. 

Monday, March 31, 2014

Getting out of the "Almost"

Either you have it or you don't. And there is a definite chance you have it. But you are not willing to have the confidence to know that you have it. The human mind is such a powerful machine. It can change things. It can change one's outlook towards life. The tough part is to know you have it in you. 

Really KNOW it.

I am almost a good dancer, almost fit, almost a creative person, almost a good director for my company. 

But haven't got out of the almost yet. Well it is probably the right time you get out of the almost. 

No time is too late to get out of this almost zone. The problem with being an almost is that you will "almost" put your best effort in doing anything. And an effort which is almost there will not reap the benefits that you need to get out of the almost zone.

Being in the almost is like not being sure about whether you like a girl
Either you like her or you don't like her. You can never "almost" like her. You just can't. Even you are thinking about someone, it is because you like her. Even if you try you can never "almost" like someone.

I am 26, I spent the last 25 years trying to discover the things I wanted, and I'm still trying to make a mark in the world. I had a major career switch in 2011, and for an ordinary person that might be a little too late, considering I was 23, had graduated with a degree that will have nothing to do with my new career. I just couldn't have "almost" switched my career. I had to choose one side. There was just no other option.

There are so many times when I sit in my balcony with a nice cup of chai and sincerely dream of all the things I want to do in life. Honestly I haven't even analyzed whether I am good enough to be able to get all those things.
But honestly, I don't care if I'm not good enough. I still want all those things.

The path to getting out of the almost is one of the most difficult. And weirdly, it is not even the amount of hard work required to get there. It is convincing your mind to believing that you can be where you want to be. I find that extremely difficult.

Start with small things.
I had been planning to apply for the Charles Wallace Scholarship for art in the UK. I had thought about it in 2012 as well as 2013. But every time I would think of creating my profile, I would always think "Let me get a little thinner", "A little fitter", "Let my hair grow just a couple of inches longer". Lamest reasons now that I'm writing it out, but this is what happened. 

Truth of it is, I didn't believe that I would get it, and the fear of being rejected did not give me motivation enough to create my profile and send it. 

Another example :
I have been thinking of working in print advertisement for quite sometime as a side thing. Nothing major, but it seems to be giving me one thrill of traveling for a day, acting for something minor (considering I sincerely question my acting capabilities for longer roles). My problem is that I haven't got myself to get up and go approach an advertising agency or create a bio for it yet. When I look at myself, I am always thinking, let me get a little thinner, a little fitter, let that particular acne mark subside.

As humans the biggest thing that we fear is the Fear of Rejection
We hate to be dumped, we hate to be fired from a company, even if the company did not make us happy.

Its funny though that I have got the best things in life only after I have been rejected. I think rejection is the most powerful mechanism. It gives you a kind of drive no other emotion will give.

The feeling that because you have already hit rock bottom, and know what rock bottom feels like, now it is time to get up.

Another thing we humans worry so much about is the Fear Of Unknown
There is a simple solution for it. How will you ever know what something feels like till you don't actually experience it? There is the risk of it failing, but the hope that it will be a big success. And imagine just how awesome you will feel once it is done. 

Lastly we are all paranoid about What Others Think of Us.
This is something everyone should stop, because what people think of us has never got us what we wanted in our lives. So their opinions should mean nothing whatsoever.

Trust me, the time is passing by. The clock is not stopping for anyone. And everyone has the same time. Its how much we make a difference in that time that makes all the difference. 
So get up now, forget about everything else.

Remember all you need to do is get out of the 'almost'. Everything else will follow.